Showing posts with label Fantasy Film. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Fantasy Film. Show all posts

4 February 2019

Getting The Dragon Horn

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How To Train Your Dragon: The Hidden World is the third and allegedly last film in the franchise and so obviously concludes with all of the dragons being rounded up and shot in the head with a fucking bolt gun. I mean.. it obviously doesn't, but hopefully any parents reading would have stopped at that point and decided not to take their idiot child to see it. If it's the final film in the trilogy then I don't need this movie to make money to ensure a sequel and I don't like seeing children in the cinema. Or anywhere for that matter. If they're not annoying me themselves then the way in which they're being badly parented by their troglodyte prick parents will no doubt be pissing me off instead. In the case of this cinema outing, it was about ten minutes into the movie when some fucking idiot turned up with about thirty kids and proceeded to shine her phone into my eyes as she mentally wrestled with the concept of seat numbers. So maybe this film is a complete masterpiece and I missed it because you very specifically have to have watched the bit at the start in which my retinas were being burnt off to fully get it. However, the message of the movie is that if you love something then you should let it go. So if you love your child and you're thinking of taking them to see this film then maybe you could just have the fucker adopted and then stay at home yourself instead?