Darkness Prevails

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The new Hellboy is incredible value for money because it's only two hours long but it felt like it was on for a fucking month. The original two instalments of this series were helmed by the visionary director Guillermo Del Toro who created a fairytale world that was somehow epic in scale and yet still managed to focus on the complexities of its characters. I'm not even sure that this new film had any fucking characters now that I think about it.. Of course, it'd be difficult for any film to follow in the footsteps of one of Del Toro's with this being especially true of the Hellboy franchise. The second of his two movies was quite clearly designed to be the middle part of a trilogy and so like an unwanked dick in a massage parlour, we were all hoping that he'd return to finish it off. I understand that the studio couldn't justify the budget that he required for his final film when looking at how much he required and the box office results of those first two movies... but this new version is such a step down from what's come before that it's taking the absolute piss. It's like wanting to go to an art exhibition but because you can't afford a trip to the Louvre to see the Mona Lisa you simply settle to go down an ally to look at a page of Readers Wives that some tramp has stuck to the wall with a piece of his actual shit.