There are lots of actors and actresses
who get written about in those shitty, godforsaken gossip mags. With
nothing but page after page of bullshit and sleaze you have to wonder
who reads them and who cares? I'm interested in people in the movie
world but only in regards to their professional output. In
terms of who they're jizzing up, I really couldn't give a shiny
shite. As far as I'm concerned, the only useful thing that we could
do with magazines like 'Celebrity Cum Shots Weekly' is use them as fiery torches to burn the hacks who write them.
There are loads of different people
that seem to have been particularly affected by them but one more so
than many others must be Tom Cruise. Throughout the bulk of his
career, he's been the centre of one particularly pointless rumour
which is that he's gay. According to said rumour, the reason he won't
admit to it and keeps getting married is to prevent any damage to his
career. I'm putting it out there right now that, that is bullshit.
The reason being because nobody fucking cares. Who gives a
monkey-fuck if Tom Cruise takes a spunky shaft between the cheeks. As
far as his reputation as an actor goes, I'm pretty sure he'll be
fine. Weirdly when I go to see a film, it's to enjoy the art of
cinema, not to try and second guess who's got the greasiest skin hole
and why.
The main reason however, why Tom Cruise
isn't staying in the closet to protect his reputation, is because
he's a Scientologist. If it's his public image he's worried about
then here's my advice, don't jump about on chat shows like a stupid
fucking retard and don't admit to believing in dead aliens that live
in our volcanos. Being gay these days is a socially acceptable thing
to admit to. Being one of the most important members of a freaky E.T.
church that's shrouded in secrecy and assumed to be a mad fucking
cult is still a little abnormal.
Like I say though even that is
irrelevant to what Tom Cruise is. If he wants to dress up as a
xenomorph and wank over the night sky then by all means let him do
it. What matters are the films he makes. Unfortunately I seem to be
in the minority of people that think like that. Tom Cruise's career
has been wrongly judged by millions for the last few decades based
simply on his first few crappy films and his personal life. Maybe he
does have weird beliefs and maybe he did start off by making Top
Gun, Risky Business and Cocktail
but things have moved on. Surely
the work he's done since is enough to justify him as a great actor
and not something for us to all stand around chatting about like some
sort of fucking Wicker Man style
gossip poll.
I'm sure he likes
his films to make a lot of cash but I'm also sure that he cares a lot
about the quality of those films as well. For proof just take a look
at the directors he's worked with over the last twenty years or so.
Oliver Stone, Michael Mann, Steven Spielberg, Martin Scorsese and
Stanley Kubrick are some of the most powerful people ever to make
movies. I don't think they are likely to be bullied into a commercial
decision at the expense of their vision by the midget actor from Days
of Thunder. And that's even if he threatens to curse them into
the mountains or bum them to death like the magazines said.
Regardless of any
of his earlier “show me the money” shit, I love him for two
simple reasons: Collateral and Magnolia. Both of these
films are literally brilliant and both feature a stand out
performance from Cruise. Both are proof as well that he really isn't
too worried about being seen as the shiny, clean cut action star that
some people think of him as.
Collateral was
released in 2004 which makes me feel depressingly fucking old and
tells the story of a poor unfortunate cab driver whose next customer
happens to be a sociopathic hitman. Throughout the night the cabbie
obliviously drives form one target to the next only becoming aware of
the situation when like The Weather Girls predicted it starts raining
men. Or at least it starts raining one man, onto the roof of his taxi
and with a couple of bullet holes in his body. From this point on
they continue the task of bumping off a couple of unfortunates with
each murder being punctuated by a car ride and philosophical
conversations about the meaning of life.
Cruise
is literally amazing as Vincent and sails through the film like a
slick, silver haired assassin. He's basically Philip Schofield but
with a slightly more psychotic ability to kill. In a way this film is
sort of like the anti Mission Impossible.
Both are action movies in which Cruise plays a hired killer but
whereas 'Ethan Hunt' is character designed solely to allow Cruise to
show off his stunts, Vincent is much more talkey. With his
philosophical views on life and what we should be doing, he's
basically a selfish Tyler Durden.
Both
Vincent and Durden can see how shit our world is and how stupid we
all are. They can both see how we allow ourselves to be repressed by
the rules we don't necessarily agree with and how we might
accidentally fall into an averagely boring life simply because it's
the done thing. The difference is that Tyler wants to change this, he
wants to shake up the system, have us all revel in anarchy and be who
we want. Vincent on the other hand is quite happy to exploit it for
his own gain. When Durden finds a man in a job he hates he shoves a
gun into his mouth and tells him to become a vet within the the next
few weeks or he'll come back and kill him. When Vincent finds out
that Jamie Fox has been a driver for 12 years he simply mocks him for
it.
The way
that Cruise plays Vincent is as though he's a lone wolf lost in the
city. He's hunting for survival in a environment that he doesn't
belong in. As things go slightly wrong he starts to look uglier and
angrier and any likeable charm that he may have been displaying is
instead replaced by a sociopathic need to kill. With his grey hair
and sunken eyes Cruise basically looks like how he's going to in
twenty years time when the aliens really do land here and just point
and laugh at the notion of Scientology.
Likeability
aside though there's no doubt that Vincent is cool. He's got an
answer for everything, a decent sense of humour and he couldn't give
a shit about the consequences of what he's doing. You get the
impression that he's not even killing for the money rather because
it's simply the only thing that there is for him to do. In todays
economy and with jobs being as scarce as they are, a man with that
“can do” attitude for work should only be respected in my book.
His
performance in Magnolia however
is the complete opposite of this
again. 'Frank TJ Mackey' is a smug, slimy, misogynist cunt. He's
exploitative, defensive and if it wasn't for his shitty past, he'd be
pretty much morally unforgivable. Justin Bieber is the kind of
celebrity maggot that exists simply to make a lot of people a lot of
money. Bieber
is an artistic vacuum, a talentless product and a commodity for young
girls to drool over before they realise that vaginas are for more
than just pissing with. Basically that punchable muppet is the kind
of dislikable, money whoring tool that Tom Cruise is wrongly accused
of being. I say wrongly because if Cruise was even slightly part of
the system that Bieber is he wouldn't have done Magnolia.
Think of the audience Bieber aims himself at and then try and imagine
how disillusioned they would become if they heard him say lines like,
“Seduce
and Destroy will teach you the techniques to have any hardbody blonde
just dripping to wet your dick.”
Magnolia
is
a slice of genius and one of the best ways to pass three hours that
won't result in a dead hooker and a cocaine addiction. It's a modern
epic with one of the best casts of all time doing their best to give
the most memorable performance within a particularly mental but
heartfelt story. However it's Cruise that runs away with the movie
for simply throwing himself into the character without a worry for
his dignity or reputation. By the time the credits come up we've seen
frogs fall from the sky, a random musical number and a young boy piss
himself. Despite this though, most people are still thinking about
whether they actually heard that young warrior from Legend
telling a crowd of sweaty men to, “Respect the cock and tame the
cunt”.
'Frank
TJ Mackey' is what people would for some reason call a brave
performance. I fucking hate that though as to call a performance
brave is to basically admit that you don't understand acting. We're
not judging Cruise for the things Mackey says because unless you're
remedial it's kind of obvious that they're two different people. The
only performance I could think of as being brave would be The
Deer Hunters
Russian Roulette scene and that would only be if it was done for
real. I don't think that playing Mackey was brave because of what it
might do to Cruise's public reputation. Rather, I think that it was a
good move for him to show off how good an actor he actually is. It's
a basic rule that if you shout cock and cunt for long enough we'll
eventually forgive any cheese that an actor may have made in the
80's.
Either
way though, I guess nothing is going to change anytime soon. The
people who read those fuck awful trash magazines will continue to lap
up all of the bullshit celebrity sex and misery that is printed in
them. Tom Cruise will continue to be disliked by many for reasons
other than his films and the world will continue it's downward spiral
of stupidity, shallowness and self-destruction. In fact the only
celebrity whose sex life should maybe be mentioned is Roman Polanski
or Richard Gere's. The day Tom Cruise bums a child or shoves a rodent
up his arse is the day I'll show mild but passive interest. Until
that day though I'm pretty sure there's a new Mission
Impossible
to catch up with.
Follow this blog or I'll fucking cut you.
Wow, amazing article dude. I totally agree with you, both he and the Scientology religon is being unfairly judged thus attacked in the mainstream media. Thats why I apperciate theese kind of articles. Good job sir! I will not follow you, but please keep uttering your own opinion in contradiction to the other sellout corporate owned-news firms. Well written!
ReplyDeleteI'm not really defending Scientology just Cruise's performances in certain films. Scientology to me seems as corrupt and morally repugnant as most organisations that consist of more than four members. However thanks for your encouragement and kind words. I also like your name.
DeleteThanks for writing this! Have long admired Mr Cruise's acting and could care less about his personal life. He was robbed of an Oscar for Magnolia.
ReplyDeleteCheers glad you enjoyed it! That's a good point about Tom Cruise though. In fact I am kind of surprised he hasn't won any Oscars at all. I guess that just goes to prove how much of a sham that ceremony really is.
DeleteBrilliantly written and so very true. The guy is a very good actor, and has delivered some exceptional performances for some directors that could take their pick. And that is what I go to the cinema to see. I will follow your Demon's Voice.
ReplyDelete